It's hammer time!
World-class na kuno ang Cebu. How we love to show-off to visiting government officials, investors, tourists and balikbayan's our new, modern, sleek, concrete and steel, computerized, sophisticated facilities be it a hotel resort, airport, traffic system or fastcraft. World-class tuod, but our manners put us back to the backwoods and barrios. Correction please, the people at the barrios are more gracious and civil than Cebu's residents. We're rude and crude, and by God, we're even proud of it … paugat gyud.
This is an observation shared not only by foreigners, but by balikbayan's and locals. We don't have to look beyond our road habits to know this is true. Drivers, commuters and pedestrians alike elbow, shove and bump one another to get ahead of everybody. A jeepney driver will stop in the middle of the street, blocking traffic, so he could pick up passengers. Here comes a private vehicle that tries to get past this jeepney and chances are the jeepney driver won't let him. Be a courteous driver and let people cross the street, and they respond by taking their sweet time as if they're strutting in a fashion catwalk. I can't figure for the life of me why jeepney and taxi drivers slow down when they see you standing by the road, but once they realize that you only want to cross the street, that you don't want a ride, they step on the accelerator.
Cebuanos are a difficult audience as many visiting performers aver. We talk with our seatmates while somebody is performing, delivering a speech, or giving a sermon. We are very stingy with our applause and cheers. At hang-outs like Balls or Pards, our version of a hip and sophisticated audience is to affect an air of indifference and stare woodenly at singers who belt their hearts out and musicians who wear themselves out trying to induce the crowd into foot-stomping frenzy.
At malls and other crowded places, we don't even have the grace to say "excuse me" or "I'm sorry" when we bump somebody, albeit unintentionally. Last Saturday, as people milled at the intersection of Osmena Blvd. and P. del Rosario St. for the Sinulog procession, a candle vendor accidentally bumped a middle-aged guy, spilling the contents of her basket tray on the road. She apologized profusely to him as she knelt down to pick up her strewn candles and carboard cut-outs. He looked at her briefly, wordlessly under his gold-rimmed eye-glasses and continued his conversation with his female companion, pretending not to notice the woman kneeling right before him. This guy, neatly dressed in his casual garb of collared cotton shirt and slacks, was waiting for the Sto. Nino so he could join in the religious procession. How is it that we can be so devoted and fervent to our religious duties, but don't have the decency to be considerate of the people around us?
We make a nuisance of ourselves inside moviehouses, giving running commentaries to our girlfriends on what the plot is about, talking to cellular phones, making other noises eating chips or butong pakwan. At the former Belvic Theatre I wanted to throttle the woman behind me for reading out loud all the text on screen, from the "proudly presents" to the cast of extras. Heaven help us if that film had sub-titles.
Don't you just loathe going into the comfort rooms of the plushest hotels and find the previous occupant's footprints in the toilet seat? How about trying to arrive ahead of time to watch a show or concert, only to find the best seats have been reserved, sequestered by one or two people who put a handbag in that chair, a handkerchief here, and a notebook over there.
Everybody clamors for the strict implementation of the "first come, first served" rule, but everybody also wants to be specially exempted from all rules. What kind of leaders do we have as role models? Officials who preach to us about obeying the rules and regulations, but get huffy and puffy when they are caught parking in no-parking zones, going around in motorcycles without wearing helmets, and driving government vehicles to schools, beaches and karaoke joints.
This column is not about bashing Cebuanos in particular, but everybody who lives here. I can also praise the indomitable Cebuano spirit to the high heavens but that's another topic.